Friday, July 15, 2016

What do I have left to say?


What do I have left to say? What do I have to fight for? I am a white girl who goes to a private college prep school and lives in a beautiful town. I have a family that loves me and friends whom I can count upon. What is there left to change? What struggles do I face? I have never felt real hardship or discrimination. What battle can I relate to? Will I just look like a self-righteous white woman who is trying to help others as a way to ease her conscious about her plain upper middle class living. Will my acts of charity or rages of protest seem selfless or selfish? Where do I fit in? When we live in a world with so much poverty and I am concerned that people at school will pull back the curtain see that I’m not like them. I don’t have a mother who drives a Cadillac escalade and carts them everywhere, I don’t exclusively shop designer. But the problem is the more and more I trying to fit in the more I stand out in the real world. As I try to fit in with my 1%er peers I feel people start to see me as a self-righteous white woman who will never learn to work hard. At least that is what I think they think when I tell them I live in Chestnut hill and attend Germantown Academy. But I think it’s time I tell the story of who I really am and stop living between two worlds. And if you pull back the curtain of white private school kid you see that I am an athlete, a scuba diver, actor, artist and a girl who loves history, old music and movies. I am a normal person who is trying to determine right from wrong and attempting to make the world a better place. So what do I have left to say, you ask? Plenty.

By: Margaret Horvat

9 comments:

  1. This piece is so relevant and honest. The cliché, "Don't judge a book by its cover" comes to mind here. The ending, "So what do I have left to say, you ask? Plenty." is very powerful. Your determination shines through this work!

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  2. I agree that the ending is especially powerful; I love how you re-define yourself there. I think many people, myself included, can relate to this piece.

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  3. I would like to mention that this is a very expressive and heartfelt piece of work, I especially like the ending where you repeat the question"So what do I have left to say? Plenty. Margaret, by virtue of the fact that you are a part of this world your voice should be heard and that you have a valuable contribution to make in striving to make this world a better place.

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  4. Bravo...You get your feelings out there to the world. You sound like the type of person I would love to meet again in ten years. You have your eyes wide open to the world seeing what is good and what needs to improve. Go forth and make this a better society.

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  5. I'm repeating a prior reply here but I say WOW to all of today's posts! At first each post seems so different. But then I think about them and I see repeating themes or ideas or questions.
    First I see individuals who want to be seen and appreciated for who and what they are. Individuals who work hard to be something others will admire and respect. Is the boy on the corner who wants "the man" to see him as a good employee different from the girl who works hard at a private school?
    What about family and friends? The boy on the corner "in one unit" is looking for what the girl has in her family and friends. The musician knows that the boy is looking in the wrong place but will his song make a difference? Is the girl's song any less meaningful? Can we ever find a common song?
    And what about the moms? Does the mom who sends her daughter to pick up her "package" love her daughter less than the private school mom? If she didn't "need" that "package", would she be so "savage"? What about a mom who only wants her child to smile all the time, is she being unreasonable?
    The Corner and The Academy, so far apart and yet so close. Or are they? Where are those gods when we need them?

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  6. I can very much relate to your thoughts and feelings. I, too, felt that as a white girl (I'm from a middle class family, not 1%) I had nothing to say. But there are no financial hardship requirements for having a passion for justice, or compassion for suffering (look at Franklin and Eleanor Roosevelt!) Thank you for speaking your truth!

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  7. I have felt the exact way you have expertly described here. I am super lucky that I have not gone through real hardship and have never felt discrimination, even if it is around me. When people talk about their background and how they grew up, I tend to be quite because I don't want them to think of me in a different way than what they have already come to know. I never talk about my privilege and most people would never know about it. You are not alone, and what you have come to realize, which I hope everybody eventually can, is that we are more than just background and privilege. We are so much more. Kudos to you.

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  9. Margaret, I appreciate the honest stream of consciousness and cyclical nature of your piece. I think most people struggle with the two (or more) worlds in which they live--and perhaps feel like they don't fit into either. No matter what your background, you still have your experience and your truth to offer others. Through your reflection and awareness of your privilege you have found something to say. And please, keep saying (and writing) it! Never undermine your story because your voice--everyone's voice--is worthy and powerful.

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